Life, Law, Libido offers some better answers to the question "Do you sodomize your wife?
- "No, but I sodomize yours."
- "Yes, and I recite the Pledge of Allegiance while doing so."
- "Yes, but only when she lets me dress up like a duck hunter."
- "No, but Wonkette and I have had some wild nights."
- "No -- I only engage in strict seduction."
- "Yes, but I don't allow electronic recordings of it."
- "Yup. I'm also a prostitute, a recreational heroin user, and a baker."
- "No way! What do you think I am, some sort of bearded, sandal-wearing weirdo?"
- "Hell yeah! And we invite others to join in, because orgies eliminate social tension."
- "Sometimes. I decide on a case-by-case basis."
For obvious reasons
, I like item 7.