The future (WooOOoo)
In the war on terror, the White House counsel's office will determine that Article II of the Constitution grants the president the authority to ignore civil law, command the sea, and transubstantiate bread into tax cuts. Some uncertainty will remain over the president's traditional vulnerability to red and green kryptonite.
In the dark realm of the Mainstream Media, the New York Times will irresponsibly reveal the existence of a classified military program which trains interrogators to devour the hearts of suspected terrorists in order to absorb their secret knowledge and fighting strength. Civil libertarians will protest, forever dooming the Democratic Party to permanent minority status.
In a shameless act of yellow journalism, the Washington Post will irresponsibly reveal the existence of a top secret FBI program to fight terror with the domestic use of alien mind control slugs, which have only been inserted into the brains of Americans with clear ties to al Qaeda. Privacy advocates will protest, forever dooming the Democratic Party to permanent minority status.
"Lesbiocracy," too. You'll have to click through to find out about that.